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Thursday, March 29, 2012

wise in deciding marriage


MARRIED is a big decision in our lives. This is an option that does not mess around. Choose a partner with which we will build a family, lowering descent and lived together in the whole atmosphere is not the only issue for a two year course, but for the entire year. For a period of time forever. In fact not only in the world, but also for the afterlife. Thus, we need to consider carefully and mature about this.
Indeed, any decision in our lives is a major event. Of the decision, the future course of events will continue to roll. There is a proverb old, the thousandth step begins with the first step. We need to be careful and meticulous when it decides, whatever. Ancient Chinese people have a saying, a thousand stones broken an inch loss. Thus, the decision was a meeting with a revolution.
When we really have chosen a partner, then immediately we have decided to live with a stranger, leaving parents and families who have been membersamai with all its warmth. The choice to live with the couple really impossible unless we are absolutely convinced that happiness with her father can also reach us by living with a partner. The choice to live with it really impossible unless we are sure that the partner will be an advocate and protector, as brothers and sisters to protect us. All of this takes a strong conviction from the heart.
Therefore, I can understand why the marriage covenant is called the Al-Quran as mitsaqan ghalizha, very strong agreement. It is a sacred covenant. A great deal between a man and a woman with a witness Allah Lord of the Universe.
May Allah wa ta'ala tabaraka always align and set our intention that marriage is the struggle to pursue the path of His Prophet's Sunnah and worship Him. Of course, we want to start this struggle with a fistful of confidence that our choice for married couples is an option to please Allah and His Messenger.
When a man about to choose a partner, there are four things that can he met a woman: beauty, lineage, wealth, and religion. This religion came to teach that the highest glory is to religion.
There is a word, most men prefer women with a very pretty face. That's okay. But we must realize that beauty is not just for looks that would bring blessings to a marriage. So it is with offspring and wealth. There are more perfect than that, namely in the woman of noble character. There is no religion in his life.
In many traditions, the Prophet always asked his companions to see the first Muslim women who want dipinangnya. The goal is that the companions were found "something" that made him interested and able to preserve her marriage. In understanding that we need to put a face beauty, lineage and wealth. Indeed, our great Prophet made a will saying that the greatest fitnah for men are women. May we not fall in the range of such women.
So, looks beautiful, noble, and children of the rich is not the main cause. If we do not find in his noble character, the choice should be imposed.
There are interesting figures from the Quran about the couple husband and wife. Each of these is clothing for others. Like the clothes, there are many kinds of clothing that has fulfilled the terms for genitalia close fit his religious beliefs, but to impose a choice on an outfit, we need to consider the sense and our hearts.
Conversely, there are also many interesting clothes, but if the wear aurat becomes uncovered, in order to have something interesting clothes.
So must choose a partner. If you only weigh a pretty face, the marriage will only publish humiliation. As beauty that will soon be gone, such a marriage would quickly wither. But, if you just pick the good of religion alone, scared, too, if the eye and the heart becomes less intact. So I understand the recommendation of the Prophet to see the first Muslim women who want to groom. Is it not rooted in Scripture, "And among His signs is that He created his wives for you from jenismu own, so you tend to him and was comforted, and made him among you a sense of love and affection. Verily in this is truly there are signs for people who think. "(Surat ar-Rum [30]: 21)
If I remember rightly, Mother Khadijah ra is also the holy women who ogled lots of charming princes of Quraysh. A'ishah, the Mother is a beautiful young girl. Lady Zainab bint Jahsh ra also has a beautiful face. Likewise, Mary al Qibthiyah ra white-skinned beauty who could make A'ishah jealous. Allah and His Messenger are more aware of the wisdom behind the sandstone faces of the Mother of the Faithful us.
Then, of course, a good dress is a meeting in accordance with religious rules and liver taste. As recommended by the Prophet, have a good faith and there is "something" God willing, will sustain a marriage. I think, such a pair is perfect for us. Hopefully "something" that brings blessing that led to our arrival shalihah wife. The Prophet said, this is the best of the jewelry world and the most precious treasure.
When we are sure, hopefully the belief that we hold in accordance with the way the Prophet and had a sprinkling of the pleasure of Allah, the Glorified.
So, there's nothing to prevent us hasten to ask for her hand with all the praises of Allah the Most High.
At the moment we are considering to select it, we realized it was not for the life of ourselves alone, but also for both mothers fathers, families and our children's future.
The Prophet said, shalihah wife is the most beautiful jewelry. Every day, shalihah wife will be a poem that always decorate. The poem was not formulated by the language and unspoken by any words. What is clear, the poem is so beautiful. Seemed lulled rocked. And for children later, the wife will thus be the main madrassas for them. Softness will clear up the hearts of children. And is not if a blood clot (heart) it's all good then let him?
I am fully aware that finding a wife who is like hunting shalihah pearls on the ocean floor. Nun in there, inside the shell was happy to be shalihah wife and take care of myself. And to find it, we have to dive in the depths, but we will know when he's as valuable as what we've got it.
***
A wedding is preceded by a full awareness of free choice and responsibility. Early period of marriage is the beginning of the struggle to foster a sense of sympathy and menyuburkannya be love.
The Quran calls the love between husband and wife with the words afdha. Meaning, such as the openness of space. In such love, no longer full of attitude pretending. One time, maybe we'll come to a wife with a pile of problems and we did not hesitate at all to complain about the burden and may even cry in her lap. Although, when we are outdoors, we keep going with the air which is always cheerful. Once, the great Prophet Muhammad peace and blessings 'alaihi wa sallam went to Lady Khadijah radhiallahu' anha in a state of anxiety and doubt after received the first revelation. With its mild, Mother Khadijah ra soothe and strengthen the heart of the Prophet.
I was amazed by Umar ibn Khattab ra sentence. He said, a man will be the children when he was alone with his wife.
Instead, the Prophet also has a very warm attitude to every wife. When the Prophet with some friends. A messenger arrived with a tray of food. When the tray came to know from Umm Salamah ra, ra Ayesha immediately reveal incredible jealousy. So he threw the tray was broken. The Prophet smiled and said he was only a modest course on his companions, "Your mother is jealous". There is a tremendous role model in every inch of life of the Prophet.
One time, there is a friend who complained to 'Umar about the angry wife to him. Companions Umar answers the unexpected. "My wife was angry with me, but I said nothing. He is taking care of my house, washing clothes, cooking food for me and care for my children. He has the right to be angry at me if I did not think him. "There is an unusual example in every corner of the companions of life.
Each pair would always crave the birth of true love. Likewise we are, I'm sure miss him too. For me, the epitome of true love is the love that is owned and presented by Muhammad peace and blessings 'alaihi wa sallam on Mother Khadijah radhiallahu' anha. Cinderella and her prince instead of princess. Romeo and Juliet nor. Or romance stories in books and plays cheesy.
Of course, the couple's love of the Prophet and Mother of the believers was too perfect for us. Perhaps the distance as far as earth and sky. But, at least we have a main mirror how we shall have to take a stand, gave birth to love it and then take care of him warmly. If God wills the Prophet as a human hasanah uswah, then the model must be achieved. As difficult and certainly can be reached any sesusah. From here begins the struggle to preserve marriage. From here the struggle to remain faithful to mitsaqan ghalizha be real. From here, may the prayer of the Prophet for the bride and groom can be realized, there is peace, love and mercy. There sakinah, there mawaddah, and no mercy.
May Allah, God the Merciful and Compassionate, memantaskan us to be surprised with a gift from heaven, the couple who worships and shalihah. Amin.

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