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Wednesday, June 20, 2012

I have not been embraced by men

At that time I was still very young to the size of the urban, 14 years. Encounter with a man in the county made me fall in love, first love, otherwise he too. He was often waiting for me when I came home from school. Love was intercepted, we often meet. There is a sense of longing when a day is not met. Our relationship more closely. Began to experiment kissing. I always remember the first time we kissed. It does not seem to be forgotten until now. Because I was too drunk to forget the love which is worthy and what is not, and that made me pregnant.
Until one day I received word that he had motor vehicle accidents, and can not be saved. My heart feels very sad moment, an indescribable sadness. I'm not a girl anymore, especially when I was pregnant. Even my brother said, I had fainted several times, it's dark world of that time, two big things that made me think back then that I loved and lost a pregnancy. Do I have to bear all such actions alone? When attending a funeral like it I jump in the grave, to catch up.
After that I was experiencing a protracted sadness, pain feels abandoned one that we love widowed first and all of a sudden. If we cut a girlfriend may be treated with even though we can still see it already owned by someone else, but when it is different from nature, how like to see? Sometimes it feels like to meet in a dream to treat missed, just once, but the more I want it even more difficult to sleep.
I am old sorrow, until finally I was rebuked by my parents. To mask her grief I were married by my parents. When I met my future husband, I do not have any taste to it. I realize that this is not his will as well, he just helped me to forget my grief.
Finally I did a deal with him before the marriage, which contains that you can enjoy the whole body but do hope you get my love and I want this marriage did not last long, if I'm pregnant, I want him to be divorced so my son was born, and do not look for me, when my son asked his father if I said that he had died. So do not look for me and do not look for her son, she did not know that I'm pregnant seeds of love from my first boyfriend.
Agreement he had received, I understand that time again-flowering bloom, many people have wanted me. While he was without competing only with the direct appointment, get me, so he immediately accepted the agreement. Maybe in his mind for what love is important he gets me and won the struggle for me.
With a very simple wedding ceremony once we become a couple. Like a pair of wedding we had the name first night but not as beautiful as I imagined, only apparent because it is without a foundation of love that ignites. Further the lives of us were not much different from other households. Until I tell my husband that I was pregnant. He responded with a cold, maybe he knew that the seed in my stomach instead of her.
After the gynecologist has reached day delivery is complete. I'm getting a baby boy, at my age that to 16. After a period of nifasku done, I promise on my husband's bill. He was without the slightest sense of sadness immediately process the divorce. My parents ask you why, because we already have an agreement from the beginning before the wedding so we did a play in order to achieve the purpose of divorce, they ultimately receive. I became a widow with a baby boy at a young age, almost 17 years.
Why did I choose this way? Because why should we live together with people we do not love. While the baby is part of my life, because of the seed people I loved very much. I still remember my boyfriend who has been before me, I knew it was love, yeah my first love, my true love, and I still feel it as her lover despite the different nature.
After I felt it was somewhat recovered, I started trying to work in factories in the county, at that time I was over the age of 17 years. During the widowed and unemployed, for while I was helped by my brother. Work at the plant turned out pretty well, tired. Less than a year working in a factory, I was offered my friend to work in Jakarta, without thinking immediately I received, my baby Leave me to my sister.
Jobs in Jakarta that I received as a clerk, quite a while since I worked here until I was nearly 19 years. I received a larger salary than working in a factory in my village, but my expenses are also rather large in Jakarta, to the money that I sent to town for my son is not so different from just over a few hundred thousand dollars only. A few months later my friend took me to Jakarta changed jobs, I lived in Jakarta alone, without friends and relatives.
One day I got the news that my son was sick and I had to return to the village. After my recovery I returned to town, it turns out my job position has been filled with other people and I've not needed anymore, it's sad. I'm looking for a friend who used to invite sedesaku to Jakarta to ask if there is work for me. After meeting him. He was invited to work in its place is a massage place. He explained the work he does, also practice directly to me at his boarding place.
After I consider, just like that, well I have received. Without the use of letters and certificates, I received and direct the work.
The first day, I work, clumsy, too, was still able to practice in a back room, now has entered the room, confused too, I was fortunate to get a sense of the first guests. He is aiming just a massage, do not know whether he is pleasing me, he said pijatanku delicious and after I receive the money tips. Not working too well so the money can be pretty tired but, unlike so salesman, standing continuously for eight hours of rest were given only one hour.
Guests to the two, began to fumble, I could not accept it until I give to my other friends, happy to accept my friend. I just want guests who just need a massage course. Day in and day out, finally I know what my place. If you want to be money well to be brave.
Said my friend here is not no love, only money. Do not fall in love with the guests. But puaskanlah guests, made to be completed, paid and completed. I shudder to hear. Sure he's a lot of guests. Do not look at her face, not cute like bad is important to pay, he said. Here the behavior is not cute she said, with money that behavior. He showed that he can cash tips today, he has a room of five people, two hundred thousand dollars a person, cut daily fee (snack + playing cards / guest waiting idly give roomboy + cigarettes +) at least nine hundred thousand net brought back in the day so that the net income a month for an average of twelve million dollars net with no income tax withheld 21, it has been reduced by several days of work since coming months.
If I notice here is still no love, but still wrote a sense of jealousy when his guests move on to other people, not jealous because of love but because of his income to switch to someone else. Many also put others down, whether openly or covertly.
Some say to a visitor if he is, he was, was out sick sub urban area. There is a plastic surgery to cover up its shortcomings, there is an implant put in his body, even to klitnya. Let bestselling he said.
One time my first guests always wanted with me anymore, because it longs to pijatanku. Because I've never met her clumsy no more, other than that I like him as polite, do not grope me. I'm still his intention was to work the rub, because it uses uniform skirts up to my thighs in contact with his ass; position and I massaged her stomach with her ass occupied. Well now he's on his back seemed to have enlarged his penis, I do not care, I covered with a towel available, I still do massage on the feet and hands and a bit in the stomach.
Until finally she pleaded with, to help him out a call passion that has culminated with the way his cock memasturbasi. First I said that I could not do that, then I taught him until he ejaculated and I get a sizable gratuity.
Finally I've got a pattern of work, if guests want to play then I give to my friend, if only just a massage I do, well I'm up to massage his cock until ejaculation. Fair tips that I got in one week is equal to one month working as a salesman.
It seems that the first father was massaged into my regular subscription. Once he asked ijinku, if I do not mind, it feels like he's holding me, anyway first I refused, but saw her behavior is rude and always gives a hefty gratuity, then kuijinkan he felt me, provided I was a full dress; there are also fear of losing customers as well as he, given the competition a huge, oddly enough he does not want a massage but with myself.
At the meeting the umpteenth time, he was able to touch my breasts also groin, frankly I could not refuse his request that is always said when we met, rayuannya which sometimes made me forget myself, besides the money I earned tips are also getting bigger, and that can not be I avoid is that I also have a need for it, I'm not a hypocrite, because I have been a widow for nearly three years. Native, was the first time I felt the wet groin after so long not to feel it, not to mention the risks of everyday work that I faced was to see an enlarged genitalia even hold that demands to be issued "contents".
Until the father knows my story, because after each massage, she always satisfy myself with nimble fingers to his own ejaculate as well, and continued to talk about my problems sometimes also the problem of the father. The father was surprised to see the journey of my life like that, which he finally hugged me. Ohh it feels, I have not been embraced by men, it seems there is a feeling that never goes away, that feeling of being protected, a sense of security.
Before long we had each other's lips drew together, I like the way he kissed me. He can generate turbulence birahiku long outages. Maybe I've brought my soul without noticeably swift currents do not know how the father until I was naked. With patience he kissed my lips until I can barely breathe, and started down toward my neck, tingling mix delicious blend into one, I'm looking for If there were a handle that can be reached for the handle to be due to fear of falling is very, very, did fall into the abyss of pleasure, at least to prove to myself that I was not dreaming, this is a real pleasure, not virtual.
Bed linen has fallen to the floor due to my feet and legs rontaan moving, like he was climbing the hill, the hill of pleasure, as a result only a spring mattress is wrapped in materials like leather that become slick with sweat us. I'm still trying to find grip, and I found the father's head, which sometimes wipe my hair because it was so delicious kujambak sucking mouth who crushed both my breasts.
Kiss you on the downside and reached the groin, groin I'm embarrassed when viewed closely, not because its ugly or the presence of multiple scars are almost lost in the groin near the hole anusku, but I have quite a bit wet since we kissed, then I was again appetites, so I was embarrassed when he learned that I was really turned on. I closed the groin with both palms.

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